Sunday 31 January 2016
Friday 29 January 2016
Inheritance of generational trauma (my Rhodesian story) - YouTube
Inheritance of generational trauma (my Rhodesian story) - YouTube:
permaculturedesigner
It is always easier to side with the perpetrator. Join the winning team! Although I would say there is deeper neurological patterning attraction going on, not to say there is/is not institutionalization. What I mean by that is that people who have been trauma bonded somehow magnetically attract future NPDs/abusers. I am starting to think ideologies are an externality and that what is really going on is that reinforcement of one set of neural firings of one type of brain attracts a different set of reinforcements in a different brain.
Reply · 1
Jennifer Armstrong
+permaculturedesigner I wasn't trauma bonded. That is a mocern thing, where individualism holds sway. I was deeplyk, deeply repressed and somewhat schizoid from all of the abuse.
Reply · 2
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Jennifer Armstrong
+permaculturedesigner My difficulty was that I didn't know the language of emotion, especially as it pertained to Western culture. In my former culture, if you needed some help for something you would speak to someone senior in authority, with a stiff upper lip )on both parts) and they would help you out. But the level of emotion I bought to my situation to try to get others' assistance was never right. I couldn't judge what was a convincint emotional level to indicate urgency and at the same time self-control. In any case, my project may have been defeated from the start, because of the ideology that I was already "privileged", set up for life by my supposedly lucky origins, and that it was everybody else, not me, who was struggling. It was very hard for me to get out of the schizoid state.
permaculturedesigner
It is always easier to side with the perpetrator. Join the winning team! Although I would say there is deeper neurological patterning attraction going on, not to say there is/is not institutionalization. What I mean by that is that people who have been trauma bonded somehow magnetically attract future NPDs/abusers. I am starting to think ideologies are an externality and that what is really going on is that reinforcement of one set of neural firings of one type of brain attracts a different set of reinforcements in a different brain.
Reply · 1
Jennifer Armstrong
+permaculturedesigner I wasn't trauma bonded. That is a mocern thing, where individualism holds sway. I was deeplyk, deeply repressed and somewhat schizoid from all of the abuse.
Reply · 2
▼
Jennifer Armstrong
+permaculturedesigner My difficulty was that I didn't know the language of emotion, especially as it pertained to Western culture. In my former culture, if you needed some help for something you would speak to someone senior in authority, with a stiff upper lip )on both parts) and they would help you out. But the level of emotion I bought to my situation to try to get others' assistance was never right. I couldn't judge what was a convincint emotional level to indicate urgency and at the same time self-control. In any case, my project may have been defeated from the start, because of the ideology that I was already "privileged", set up for life by my supposedly lucky origins, and that it was everybody else, not me, who was struggling. It was very hard for me to get out of the schizoid state.
Thursday 28 January 2016
Wednesday 27 January 2016
Tuesday 26 January 2016
shamanic
Nietzsche, Bataille and Marechera were all shamanic because they all drilled into the inner world of the psyche and made it their adventure ground. Marechera, though, went further outside the bounds of civilisation. He experimented physically with being very, very wild. He lived the adventure on his own terms, specifically as a vagrant and one who made his own rules and was prepared to live or die on the basis of them. He recorded the impact on his psyche of following his own rules and living on his own terms. He looked at civilisation from the outside and recorded the impact of his alienation in terms of his inner landscape. In all of this he spoke to his people and his time about their limits -- political, psychological and otherwise.
Monday 25 January 2016
Shamanic paradox in the use and exploitation of schizoid states - YouTube
Shamanic paradox in the use and exploitation of schizoid states - YouTube: "Antistar211 32 seconds ago
Would it be possible for a modern person to read Marechera and understand him?
Reply · 1
Jennifer Armstrong 1 second ago
+Antistar211 I think the biggest difficulty for a modern person is that they are not burdened by Superego in the same way as a non-modern person is. When I read Marechera, what took my breath away was that he had not been forcibly annihilated by his Superego. Authoritarian culture tends to create schizoids, not narcissists. Schizoids have very flattened and underdeveloped feelings, and probably a lot of rage, which rarely gets expressed. There is a heavy lid over their heads all the time that prevents them from understanding themselves or expressing much of anything. That is the force of FORBIDDENNESS. It's the annihilating angel in the Garden of Eden, that prevents a return to Paradise. To lift that lid off one's head after one has been rendered a schizoid by the violent mechanics of the system takes tremendous courage. One ends up revealing all that one's culture wants one to repress. That is the shocking nature of Marechera's writing that is really only evident to those who have a similar schizoid nature and who are willing to open up to the experience entailed in absorbing the writing.BLACK SUNLIGHT is pretty much complete rage and transgression all the way through. Its contents are the cultural repressions of the country in a state of war and revolution. I, personally, felt annihilated by this book, but I was able to rebuild myself (although this took time).
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Reply · 1
"
'via Blog this'
Would it be possible for a modern person to read Marechera and understand him?
Reply · 1
Jennifer Armstrong 1 second ago
+Antistar211 I think the biggest difficulty for a modern person is that they are not burdened by Superego in the same way as a non-modern person is. When I read Marechera, what took my breath away was that he had not been forcibly annihilated by his Superego. Authoritarian culture tends to create schizoids, not narcissists. Schizoids have very flattened and underdeveloped feelings, and probably a lot of rage, which rarely gets expressed. There is a heavy lid over their heads all the time that prevents them from understanding themselves or expressing much of anything. That is the force of FORBIDDENNESS. It's the annihilating angel in the Garden of Eden, that prevents a return to Paradise. To lift that lid off one's head after one has been rendered a schizoid by the violent mechanics of the system takes tremendous courage. One ends up revealing all that one's culture wants one to repress. That is the shocking nature of Marechera's writing that is really only evident to those who have a similar schizoid nature and who are willing to open up to the experience entailed in absorbing the writing.BLACK SUNLIGHT is pretty much complete rage and transgression all the way through. Its contents are the cultural repressions of the country in a state of war and revolution. I, personally, felt annihilated by this book, but I was able to rebuild myself (although this took time).
Show less
Reply · 1
"
'via Blog this'
Sunday 24 January 2016
Thursday 21 January 2016
Wednesday 20 January 2016
Monday 18 January 2016
Sunday 17 January 2016
Bataille, Wolin, reposted
Bataille does not endorse immediate sense certainty. I believe that this is a mistake made by those who imagine that Bataille's agenda must necessarily be a search for "Truth". Such critics retain the old metaphysical category of Truth that Bataille has long dispensed with, when they try to critique Bataille in this way. Bataille's views were very much psychological and his writings show that he understood very much that his approach was historically situated and far from being universal in the sense that Western metaphysics would posit 'universality'. Bataille was a keen student of Hegel and Marx and thus his views were often very much situated in terms of these theoretical postulates, which do not dispense with an understanding of historically contextualised change and transformation. It is actually outrageous even to suggest that Bataille escaped into irrationalism whilst denying that he had a high level of understanding, both intellectually and experientially, of the nature of bourgeois "rationality". If his writings do not indicate that Bataille understood how the system worked, then perhaps Wolin was reading another Bataille, or reading him through the lens of metaphysical binaries, whereby rationality and irrationality are diametrically opposed, rather than being organically linked in every way (as Bataille knew them to be). Which brings me to my next point. Engaging with the negative in emotion and dialectical swing of the metaphysical pendulum (which was Bataille's actual project, contrary to Wolin) gives one the means to understand the nature of bourgeois rationality more thoroughly. Once again, this is because the irrational and the rational parts of mental processing are intricately linked (they are actually both the products of the human mind). They are not to be cordoned off separately, as if to embrace "rationality" was to renounce some kind of fixed component of irrationality. This would be practically impossible.
It seems that Wolin mistakes Bataille's project for a metaphysical one, when it was really was a psychological orientation toward the way history and politics have framed our metaphysical sense of the irrational.
It seems that Wolin mistakes Bataille's project for a metaphysical one, when it was really was a psychological orientation toward the way history and politics have framed our metaphysical sense of the irrational.
Thursday 14 January 2016
Tuesday 12 January 2016
Vlog 6
My father had that sweet-mean cycle, which was more borderline than narcissistic, and it used to make me feel desperately sad for him. He would sacrifice something or give me money, but I couldn't afford to let down my guard and love him for his selfless act, because I knew that just around the corner was coming manipulation and abuse. This sense I had that it was a selfless act he had performed, but that I couldn't respond to it (because I owed it to myself to protect myself), made me feel extremely helpless and profoundly sad. I tried to get help from all sorts of people, but the complexity of this made it impossible to understand (and I only myself understood it much more recently).
Monday 11 January 2016
Sunday 10 January 2016
Saturday 9 January 2016
Friday 8 January 2016
Thursday 7 January 2016
Wednesday 6 January 2016
Tuesday 5 January 2016
Monday 4 January 2016
Sunday 3 January 2016
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