The facts

 I come from is a highly authoritarian and Christian culture.  Because of the damage that this culture did to my ability to connect to the sensual aspects of myself WITHIN A SOCIAL CONTEXT, I developed a very high level of sensitivity to anything in the environment that would inhibit or deny my ability to make that necessary sensual connection within a social context.  That is how I came up with the discoveries I did.  Had I not been afflicted with the disease of a Rhodesian right wing character structure, I would not have been able to use myself as a sensitive measuring instrument to come up with the realizations I did.

But, having done so, I do know, without a doubt that Judeo-Christian culture is my visceral enemy.  I don’t mean I have to fight it.  I have learned to ignore it. 

But there is no point doubting what I know, which was that I had to rebuild my root system because of it, and then rebuild it after every attack.

Has this made me stronger?  Yes – in many instances.  For instance, if I still was imbued with a right wing culture, I would not have met the compatible personality I have found in Mike.  And there are all sorts of other benefits too.  But that was because I was forced to focus on my ROOT SYSTEM and develop and strengthen my connection to the sensual aspects of my being.  The attacks only made me aware of this need.  That is all.  They served no further purpose apart from that.

And of course the attacks will be continuous because I am thought to be from a criminal culture, so the moralists (Judeo-Christian types) will forever be down on my case for not being one of them.  And if I were to try to accommodate their demands, I could never satisfy those, because their demands are simply that I cease to exist.