At 39:52 -- yeah, I have had the same problem trying to align what people consider to be "abuse" with what I have experienced, because it seems to me I have experienced very extensive and traumatic abuse, having my whole identity erased, and being constantly the fall guy, whereas others view a temporary hostile attitude as being overwhelmingly "abusive" and impossible to take. I mean, really? i went through two decades of that stuff and I had to take it.
