It should be clear, by now, how to determine whether somebody is colluding in a case of bullying, or not.
The attitude of one who colludes is so anti-scientific that one gets the idea he doesn't know what a scientific investigative attitude is.
First port of call is his posture of omniscience: he was there with you, step by step, through every significant part of your life, and for the life of him, he can't see that any bullying occurred. (The colluder in bullying seems to act as if he were some kind of god, who knows things that an actual human being could not automatically know. An ordinary human needs to first investigate before he can genuinely come to a conclusion.)
Second port of call: His proclamation that all you want is a great deal of sympathy -- which, by the way, Society per se (and not just the colluder) cannot afford you. You are really asking of it too much! This tactic implies that bullying is merely an emotional or sideline issue, not a real one, pertaining to the lives and destinies of real people. If you think it is more than this, you are just being too sensitive. You are not quite real enough to warrant taking seriously.
So the colluder in bullying is the one who jumps to conclusions in a contradictory way, and without any consideration for a proper investigative mindset.
2 comments:
Can I get a witness!? It is as if when the bullying occured, it was in an alternate universe where the colluder or enabler was unable to see. I have experienced this in the past. Some of it not so recent.
Then after you disagree with the enabler, they start to gaslight you. Questioning your sanity, your grasp on reality, your ability to observe and give a credible report of your observations and other perceptions.
Then if you still refuse to kowtow to the enabler, then comes the threat phase. If you do not adopt their worldview in this manner, they shall have to write you off, and quite possibly deprive you of their social alliance, which after all, to one as crazy as this, would be socially devistating, because who wants to be friends with a crazy trouble maker?
Oh yea, know that song and dance quite well. I usually deprive the enabler of the alliance now before they do it to me. No point in sticking around, when you already know how that book ends. Cut your losses and go. The last thing you need, is your worth being determined by a person who doesn't believe in you anyhow, and isn't really your friend, because obviously as a crazy, you cannot be their equal, but instead must be their poor, special project, i.e., charity case. sigh.
Yes to the post and the comment.
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