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Many males hold that certain men are "Alpha" and that others are "Beta". This might be the most psychologically damaging notion prevalent to our time. Some males suddenly fear that they may be perceived as "Beta", whereupon the self destruct. Attacking women betrays an inner sense of insecurity that is akin to self-destruction. This is a problem relating to the fact that masculinity is experienced mainly as a cultural identity, rather than relating to a deeper level of subjectivity than that which is merely cultural. 

The notion of the "Nice Guy" who can befriend women, but in whom women lack any sexual interest, is equivalent to the idea of the "Beta" male. Self-ascribed "Nice Guys" have the notion that they listen to women's problems, but then women go elsewhere for actual sexual satisfaction.

The cultural notion that women are necessarily creatures "with problems" is a substantial part of the baggage that weighs the "nice guy" down. It's actually a form of projection. The "Nice Guy" has the nagging problem of insecurity about his masculinity. He (partially) "listens" to "female problems" as a way to atone for this sense of deficiency. At the same time, just as he does not believe that his own problems are anything other than psychological, he does not really -- in a true sense -- actually listen to what women are saying to him. His pretense at "listening" is merely a ritual by which he hopes to expel his own demons. He engages in the form of listening without  paying attention. Consequently, the woman he's involved with eventually concludes that there is something unreal and unrealistic about the kind of conversations they are having. This lack of reality eventually causes her to lose interest, whilst seeking out a guy who is able to take the risk of being open with her. She does not leave him because he is "nice", as per his rationalization, but because he does not respond to reality as if it were real -- as if it presented any challenges to him. He lives too much in his head.

The self-ascribed "Nice Guy", being too much of a prig and a sexist, is unable to take into account actual women's explanations. Rather, he tells himself (in acknowledgement of an internalisation of a self-hating "Beta" status) that women "hate men who are not mean." This is the myth he chooses to live by. It derives from other men who have "put him in his place" rather than from women, so it has the aura of male authority that female explanations lack, according to his deeply held feelings.

The Beta guy, despite proclaiming the superior nature of "masculine logic", is nonetheless (alarmingly) not sufficiently logical enough to deduce that his inferior identity in his own eyes is entirely based on the views of other men, who would compete with him in such a way as to damage his self-esteem in his own eyes. Since "masculinity" is a category of goodness and life transcending logic, in his view, he cannot see how it can lead to any harm. "It must be women who make me feel this way," he concludes, betraying reason.

Yet women and female culture are rarely as preoccupied in separating the alleged "Alphas" from the "Betas" as he seems to think. In fact, "social dominance" in a male is less appealing from a woman's point of view than it is within the narrow bounds of an exclusively male culture. Women like men who are self assured and not afraid of shadows. "